Welcome to the [new and late] Commies

commiesnomopenHi there. The Unofficially Official Awards of the AV Club are back.

Thank you for your patience. After much delay due to the crushing disappointment and requirement of real life, it’s time to discover that, sometimes, Christmas miracles do come true. Sometimes, we get to take our insanely detailed love for a website and the people who make it up, and make a goddamn awards celebration around it no matter how aggravating and seemingly endless the constant parade of forced family time may feel. No, I haven’t been drinking, why do you ask?

Anyways, a few things have been changed this year. First and foremost, I’ve cleaned the site up a little. If there’s some creaking and moaning here and there, it’s only because you bought a house that’s still settling because your budget couldn’t handle anything better, and yes, you’ll probably continue to be a failure to the in-laws. But, the good news is, is if there’s an issue on the site, just let me know, and I’ll fix it.

The other new item is  the schedule. Obviously, last year we were already done with the nominations at this point in time, but now we’re just staring. Why? Well there’s a few reasons. The end of the year turned out to be an even busier time, work-wise, than I had imagined, and last year we had to cut off some fantastic films just because of their release date. This year, we’re course-correcting.

Obviously, what happened, happened, but any film that had a wide-release after the initial nomination date for last year’s Commies will be eligible for nominations this year. Additionally, if you guys want, said films can also be open for 2013’s 2012 Film of the Year Awards, but I will defer to you guys to figure that  out in the below comments/nominating process.

There are also a few other changes to the nomination process. This year, We’re going to leave nominations open until January 15th. You’ll be able to submit your nominations using the Google Docs form I link below. For each item, you can nominate as many things as you wish, so long as they are separated by a comma. On January 20th, the final round of voting will start for two weeks, until the 31st, and on February 3rd, Awards Week will start.

In  order to make the nominations process a little easier this year, I’m creating a Nomination Pool page that anyone can freely submit to by emailing me at avclubawards@gmail.com. I will then add the suggested item(s) to the page. This is in no way an official acceptance or nomination of said item(s), but merely a way to create a list of pop culture stuffs, writers, articles, and comments that might otherwise be forgotten or lost in the shuffle. If you wish for me to post a comment, please include a link to the comment, so I can link to it from the page (as well as mention if it requires a previous comment as its set up). Ideally, this page will allow the nominations to expand and become more varied than last year, and hopefully, expand the scope of comments and articles being noticed.

Well, I believe that’s all of it. If you want to get to the nominations page, you can do so from here. Thanks for taking part, waiting for this thing, and reading through all of this nonsense. If you have any questions, suggestions, or complaints, feel free to write in the comments below or get in touch via the email or on Twitter @The_Commies. I’m pretty excited. I hope you are too.

The Commies 2013 Dates
Nominations: December 23 – January 15
Final Voting: January 20 – January 31
Awards Week: February 3 – February 7



    • Barnitosupreme

      FUCK YOU

    • http://www.avclub.com/users/ebuzz-miller,65313/ E.Buzz Miller

      Never! This can only lead to tyranny!

    • T-Dog


  • beema


  • Narrator


    • Sluggo


  • https://lazysight.wordpress.com/ sarCCastro

    ugh. more redesign bullshit

    • beema

      It’s funny because NuDisqus

      • http://www.avclub.com/users/ebuzz-miller,65313/ E.Buzz Miller

        It’s one of those funnies that hurts inside.

        • Disqusted

          Like teacher’s penis?!?

      • Lemon of Troy

        Uh, I’d also like to express my hatred for that particular comment hosting service.

  • Barnitosupreme


  • Tity Boi

    *pull-outs negotiable

    • stillsluggoafteralltheseyears

      I will donate a million dollars to cancer research if you stop posting.

      • Tity Boi

        That’s reserved for first comments ya idiot.


    • http://avclub.com/ Cookie_Monster

      We need chart of who used to have what name. Me not realize you used to be Spielbergo. And me only just find out Hooded Justice was everyone’s favorite rubber suit guy, Craig J. Clark. Commentariat give me too much to keep track of!

      • Tity Boi


        NO NO NO!! I’m merely stumping for everyone’s favorite non-union Mexican equivalent!

        You think I might sound like … thank you!

        And good idea on the names.

      • senor spielbergo

        We are definitely different people. For starters Tity Boi is recently married (congrats again btw!) and I continue to be sad and alone. A vote from you Cookie would mean a lot!

        • Tity Boi

          “Er, Spielbergo es bueno. Señor Boi … es el diablo.”

        • http://avclub.com/ Cookie_Monster

          Sorry, me on sugar high and easily confused. Still, me do feel like bunch of commentors changed usernames, in ways subtle and not, in wake of Disqupoclypse.

        • http://www.avclub.com/users/ebuzz-miller,65313/ E.Buzz Miller

          Awww don’t worry, I’m sure you’ll meet someone soon and hahahahhaha, sorry, almost kept a straight face.


    if I run the table and win everything I’m nominated for, I will tweet a selfie

    • http://www.avclub.com/users/ebuzz-miller,65313/ E.Buzz Miller

      Better include the whole wang this time.

  • K. Thrace

    Thanks, GaryX! You are a fabulous mofo.

    • http://www.avclub.com/users/ebuzz-miller,65313/ E.Buzz Miller


      • JudgeReinhold

        I wasn’t sucked up to. I am disappoint.

        • http://www.avclub.com/users/ebuzz-miller,65313/ E.Buzz Miller

          You should have my slot. I’m a waste of space to everyone and everything and I wish Iwas dead/

  • Dr. Clint Handsome

    Ladies and gentlemen, my vote is for sale and I am accepting bribes!

  • flowsthead

    I would tell you to vote for flowsthead, but being an existentialist I can only tell you that the crushing freedom of your choices will lead to despair. Who are you to vote for? There are so many choices, and you cannot pick them all. Of course, existentialism doesn’t prevent me from believing that a vote for me would be superior, but it does make me realize the emptiness with which I can make such a statement. As a realist, I know you will not vote for me, and as a pragmatist I say you should vote for Douay-Rheims-Challoner who created the TI Forum and is a swell individual, as well as for GaryX who made this despite leaving us all for the Dissolve.

  • Ayatollah Colm Meaney


    • http://www.avclub.com/users/ebuzz-miller,65313/ E.Buzz Miller

      Hey I voted you for best username/avatar and now you’re using a generic one?!?

      • Ayatollah Colm Meaney

        Disqus changes mine between each website I’m on. It’s a fucking nightmare trying to sync it up.

        • Rogue_Like

          Ain’t that the truth. I bit the bullet and just went with the username I created way back when because disqus won’t merge despite it saying it will. Fucking technology.

    • Tity Boi

      – Sincerely, Little Girl.

  • http://www.avclub.com/users/ebuzz-miller,65313/ E.Buzz Miller


    It’s just throwing your vote away!

    • Tity Boi

      He’s right, this is a two-party system!

    • repostedcustomerreviews

      Thank God This Turkey Didn’t Get Nominated.

      ~A Customer
      Reviewing Cold Mountain (DVD)

    • ChancellorPuddinghead

      Of course he would say that. This thread is clearly being influenced by the nefarious forces of The Illuminati! WAKE UP, SHEEPLE!


      • http://www.avclub.com/users/ebuzz-miller,65313/ E.Buzz Miller

        They changed that law that prevents that at last? So ends democracy with a fart and a series of jerk off motions.

  • el_sid

    “Vote for me!”
    -Bob White, Mayor of Bluffington

  • Curmudgahideen


    • NathanFordsEvilTwin

      I feel like I’m missing something here.

    • JudgeReinhold

      Keith and the Girl denied the Purple Rock Podcast, the premier AV Clubber Survivor podcast, from its rightful spot at the top of the rankings.

  • Monte Hellman’s Mayonnaise

    Vote for me for Least Relevant Commentor Who Wishes She Had More Time to Comment on Things But Has A Stupid Job And Can’t Seem To Win The Lottery Ever! You know you want to.

    • GaryX

      That’s basically “The Unicorn.”

      • Monte Hellman’s Mayonnaise

        Too pithy. I like mine better.

  • NathanFordsEvilTwin

    I don’t like change! Vote to keep me in 6th place!

    • Douay-Rheims-Challoner

      Sorry, I voted you fifth.

      • NathanFordsEvilTwin

        Awww, you rascal. I honestly expect my rank to go down because I haven’t been as active this year outside of the Who boards. Which I’m fine with because it’s an internet popularity contest.

      • SinisterOutlawScoundrel

        Hello. It’s SOS.

  • https://twitter.com/TheWillThe ComradeQuestions

    I’d like to put in my name for comptroller. I don’t know what it is, and neither does anybody else, so I’ll be perfect for it.

  • Monte Hellman’s Mayonnaise

    Looking at last year’s Commentariat Awards, it’s remarkable how much the community has changed – I feel like a lot of people who won or were runners up last year are nowhere to be found now (for better or worse). A lot can change in a year, as we all found out the hard way in 2013.

  • Sluggo

    What the hell, did someone just remove my comment?

    You don’t want to mess with me, bro. I shit standing up.

    Plus there’s always the Slugg Boyz to contend with.


    • GaryX

      (1) Strike, (0) Balls

      • Sluggo

        Hush. I’ll slap you with my bare palm.

        • GaryX

          So you go around with little boys, some without shirts, slapping things with bare palms, huh?

        • http://www.avclub.com/users/ebuzz-miller,65313/ E.Buzz Miller

          Why don’t you have a seat right over there…

  • Monte Hellman’s Mayonnaise

    Is it just me or is it extremely hard to try to think of someone to nominate for best comment? For the life of me, I cannot think back over an entire year and remember who said the best thing ever. Recently, I can think of K. Thrace’s George W. story and her All American Rejects story, but I’m sure I’m selling other peeps short.

    • GaryX

      It can be tough, but that’s also why I started the Nomination Pool this year. That way, if we can combine the different comments people remember, we might be able to open up the overall nominations just a little bit more.

    • http://www.avclub.com/users/ebuzz-miller,65313/ E.Buzz Miller

      Go to the Carrie remake review.

    • YEE YEE

      nominate ME for AW HELL NAW

    • ChancellorPuddinghead

      I just nominated myself. It’ll never take, and I’m sure whoever I end up voting for will deserve it far more than I. I mainly just wanted to start referring to myself as A.V Club Commie-Nominated Commentator Chancellor Puddinghead.

  • http://sarapen.ca/ Sarapen

    Well, I made some nominations. I didn’t want to think too hard so I left most of the spaces blank. That’s probably how I’ll vote as well.

    • http://refrigeratorrants.wordpress.com/ Merve

      It’s just like a real election!

    • SinisterOutlawScoundrel

      Hello Sarapen!


    When did exactly did nominations end in 2012? I know it was before December 17, but the exact date would be helpful for films.

  • Outrageous French Accent

    Vote for Outrageous French Accent! Vive la revolution! Wait… The germans are coming… Nevermind! *runs away*

  • Judas Booth

    Vote for me – I was posting semi-exclusive deleted scenes/alternate lines from the table drafts of beloved Simpsons episodes. Also, I am fairly amiable the rare times that I post at the AV Club.

  • senor spielbergo

    Nu-Disqus requiring me to make a new account won’t stop me from saying Spike Lee just tweeted “Great job on the Grammys” to former Tampa Bay running back Jerry Eckwood.

    ¡Viva Spielbergo!

  • ChancellorPuddinghead

    Remember that time in High School when, during Homecoming Week, we all thought it would be hilarious to nominate that one kid who wore the same jean jacket every day, ate his lunch alone in the library, never dressed for gym class but participated anyway, and smelled like an odd combination of old milk and socks? Remember when he actually made it to the voting, and we accidentally elected him Homecoming King? Stacey Borkenhagen was so mad! And then, in the yearbook, they changed the name under the caption to Davey McMilkyfart? Oh, good times, good times….


  • NerdInTheBasement

    This Commies Awards Season has juice? Man, this is gonna be off the hook!

  • WilliamBones

    A vote for WILLIAM BONES is a vote for something

  • SisterMaryFrancis

    Write me in for local county sheriff. I want to find out what they do nowadays.

  • BackFromTheGulag

    I dunno, I think all of my votes will go to Reposted a7x Fan.

  • Cookie Sluggo

    Me happy to accept nomination for Most Hated Gimmick!

    • http://www.avclub.com/users/ebuzz-miller,65313/ E.Buzz Miller

      This hated gimmick just smacks of effort.

    • RepostedAvengedSevenfoldFan

      i may not be a smart man,but i do know what a troll is

      -evuldeluxe in reply to Abjurist, 1 day ago

    • Sluggo Has Feelings


      Hey man, why’d you block me on Twitter? I was almost at 20 followers.

  • Kirk Cameron Left Me Behind

    I have to wait until February for this shit?

  • Sluggo Has Feelings

    You guys think it’s too late for me to win “most improved commenter” award? It’s my only hope.

  • Adam Sandler

    Is this the website wear I go to get my Acadamee Award for being handsum?

  • Prole Hole

    Once again my punishing mediocrity has been overlooked….

  • Douay-Rheims-Challoner

    I realise a lot of people are stumping for themselves here, so I will do the obligatory and suggest everyone consider voting Farscape for Best TV Club Classic.

    Because they were really excellent reviews that reminded me how much I love that program, to everyone’s annoyance, and if it wins it’d be a symbolic victory regarding its uncertain future?

    Well I’ve said my bit.

  • Pops Freshenmeyer


    If you were nominated for something, he’d vote for you.

Best of the AV Club Awards: The Winners
Commies 2013 – Nominations